It's been a long time!

Dear Liam,
It's been a long time since I've written you a letter! Your baby sister, Libby Rose, was born on December 13, 2012. Things have actually gone pretty well since she came home. She's a very easy-going baby, and a good sleeper. I don't think she's ever woken you up during the night, from crying, since she doesn't cry very much. The day after I came home from the hospital, you did say one mean thing to me. You said that you didn't want me to live in the house anymore. It was me you wanted out, not Libby. I admit that I cried. But, that was your only really mean moment. You've seemed to regressed in your sleep habits. Prior to Libby's arrival, you had been going to sleep without me sitting in your room, for a few months. As soon as I came home from the arrival, you went back to needing me to sit in your room until you all asleep. But, I'm just glad you haven't regressed in potty-training or anything else.

We've had some Mommy and LiLi dates, so that we have special time together. I enjoy those dates so much, and I think you do too. We've gone out to eat, or to Starbucks, or even just to the bookmobile. Now that Libby is finally starting to take a bottle (since she started daycare this week), we will hopefully be able to have more Mommy and LiLi dates.

My maternity leave was tough for you. If you were younger, you wouldn't have really realized that I was staying at home each day with the baby, but you definitely knew. Early during my leave, and even into February, you begged almost every day to stay home with Libby and I. I did give in and let you stay home quite often, oftentimes because if I hadn't given in, Daddy would have ended up late for work, due to your refusal to leave the house. The 3 week period from Libby's birthday to yours, with Christmas in the middle, was a crazy blur. You were home most of that time, which then set you up to expect to stay home after that. (And you'd stayed home with Grandma for over a week prior to her birth.) Printing out a calendar, with school and home days marked on it, really helped. And later in my leave, I kept you home on a bunch of Fridays, and used some of your vacation days at daycare.

I had to come back to work this week. When I took you and Libby to daycare on Monday, you said to the teachers, "My mommy is really sad today. She doesn't want Libby coming to this place." That really made me laugh. You get it, little man. You were exactly spot on. I've cried a lot this week, and you've been very sweet. On the way to school this morning, you said, "I hope Libby doesn't fall asleep on the way to school today like she did yesterday, because I want to be able to play with her when we get to school." Awwwww. That made my heart very happy.

Coming back to work has been really hard this time. It was hard to come back to work after I had you, but I think it's doubly hard this time, knowing that both you AND Libby are in daycare. I know that they take good care of you guys, but it still really hurts me to not be able to be with you two all the time. I think and think about ways I could possibly stay home, but there's just no way we could make it. You cried on Sunday night (before I started work again on Monday morning), and said that you wanted me to stay home with you and Libby forever. Believe me, sweet boy, I want nothing more. I had to explain that I need to work, so that we have money for our house, and food, and other things we need. You said, "yeah, like toys." Well, that wasn't exactly what I was talking about... :)

I love you,
Mommy